You tell me what has a better chance of happening:
The Red Sea being parted once again.
Getting another ark done before the next heavy rain.
Osama Bin Laden walking up to the White House with his hands up.
Mike Aguirre refusing to file another lawsuit.
In my sports book, the odds are better on the first four taking place. The Chargers still have an opportunity to play in January – probably at a Club Med.
Maybe the age of miracles hasn't past, but the Chargers need to spend the next three weeks at the Vatican for all the help they need. Divine intervention generally is reserved for more important matters, and if peace in our time hasn't been addressed, it's doubtful the Chargers winning out and making the NFL postseason is in the top 10.
San Diego hasn't been mathematically eliminated, but what was simple arithmetic yesterday morning became advanced calculus by yesterday afternoon. They have been kicked in the head.
Yesterday's 23-21 loss to the Dolphins was a killer. It was their third home defeat of the season, this time to an inferior team that just so happened to perform better than they did.
"We couldn't get anything done," said tight end Antonio Gates, who managed to get something done, catching 13 passes for 123 yards and a score. "They outplayed us today. We're supposed to protect our home."
Supposed to. With the ungodly schedule handed them, that's what the Chargers had to do, housekeep, and they didn't, so they now are looking at a gorge – at unbeaten Indianapolis, at Kansas City and AFC West-leading Denver here. And their bridge is deteriorating.
Going in, they controlled their own fate. If they won out, they would have had the division. A win yesterday would have kept them a game ahead of Pittsburgh, which wins a tiebreaker with San Diego because the Steelers won here.
Pittsburgh has Minnesota, Cleveland and Detroit remaining. Jacksonville lost to Indy yesterday, but the 9-4 Jags have a one-game lead on the Bolts and they have San Francisco, Houston and Tennessee to go. Kansas City, with the same 8-5 record as San Diego, has it tough – the New York Giants, Chargers and Cincinnati – but not as tough as the Bolts.
"It means we have three games left," coach Marty Schottenheimer was saying. "There's no finality to today. The outcome of this game does not define the season."
He has a right to his opinion, but so do I, and this loss came fairly close to defining their season. They lost a close home game and blew far too many opportunities to put the Fish away early. Uncharacteristic were the three turnovers and their shocking inability to move the football, despite holding onto it for more than 40 minutes.
They fought for every yard. LaDainian Tomlinson may not have been 100 percent with that bruised chest, but he might as well have been running in the shower. Drew Brees had to throw it 52 times. Too many.
I realize I'm an optimist, somewhat cockeyed, but this team isn't going to the playoffs and it isn't going because it couldn't win close games, including those at home. Five losses by a total of 14 points? Good teams win close games, so they say, so we all should say.
And Schottenheimer can talk all he wants about football being the greatest game in the world and give us that any-given-Sunday cliché, but this was a terrible loss to a team that had to travel across country and start Gus Frerotte at quarterback. Miami couldn't run. The Chargers allowed Frerotte, who can't get out of his own way, to shake off tacklers, scramble around and beat them. Gus Freaking Frerotte.
"This game I was able to move around and make plays moving my feet," said Frerotte, probably more surprised than anybody that he was running around like Roger Staubach.
But, more than anything, it was the Chargers inability to do anything offensively when they had great field position. That, and the continuing inability of their defensive backs to make plays.
Midway through the second quarter the Dolphins had run 10 plays for 10 total yards and didn't have a first down. But they trailed just 7-0. Behind 7-6 in the third quarter, Miami scored 10 points in a minute and eight seconds. By the end of the third quarter, the Dolphins had moved from their own 14 and scored on a 35-yard toss from Frerotte to Chris Chambers. The Chargers couldn't play uphill.
And now uphill has become Mt. McKinley. The team must win out and then hope for the best. Can't see it happening.
"It's the NFL," Schottenheimer said. "It's the way it is. I chuckle when people say we should win this game."
Go ahead and chuckle. The Chargers should have won this game. They just couldn't.
"I think we can (win out)," Schottenheimer offered. "Yeah, I think we can. Nobody passes out any bouquets until you've played 16 games."
They do at funerals. Just call me your friendly neighborhood florist.
UNION-TRIBUNE
December 12, 2005
SEAN M. HAFFEY / Union-Tribune LaDainian Tomlinson, here being tackled by cornerback Sam Madison, had a tough time gaining yards against the Dolphins.The Chargers making the playoffs.
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