Go Sage...GO!

  Broke out of the gate and never looked back. Yeah, it was the Texans. But we turned them out, like we should have. Philip Rivers was throwin' TD passes that looked like they left the hand of Billy Kilmer 35 years ago! That pass to Gates was short and wobbled like a weeble, ugly. Gates was so open he just stopped stride, waited for it, caught it, and sprinted to the house! And it went on...and on. The defense played offense. And Antonio Cromartie was the star running back.

 Antonio was the beneficiary of an all star flub. Or a chain of flubs. The Houston Texans punt team pulled a Keystone Cops play. They're names escape me. I was laughin' like a mofo when the sportscaster called the Texans long snapper the "extra long snapper"! Hilarious. HOU attempts a punt deep in their own territory and the center snapped this ball like a Brett Farve pass in reverse! Like 10 feet over the punters head! The punter had a beeline on the ball to at least kick it out of the end zone or fall on it for a 2 point safety for the Bolts. He overruns the ball, trips and falls to the ground and Cromartie just picks up the ball...TD! It was classic. The punter then proceeds to the sideline and takes his helmet off so all the world can see his freckle faced ass. You had to see it to believe how lame it was. It was like (I'm going way back here) George Plimpton Paper Lionesque. He actually faded back to pass and ran into the goal post! For real. Check out the movie "Paper Lion", it's from the late 60's but totally cool. Great football movie.

 One paragraph off subject. The Red Sox have just won the World Series in a sweep. Blastin' that ole hex to oblivion. To the Rockies, nice season. Amazing end streak. I knew the days off would kill your chances. Iam also very excited (and hungover) from watching yesterdays awesome Duck victory over the Trojans. Quack! Quack! Dennis Dixon baybee. And Ducks...wear the white uni's and helmets you wore against WA a few weeks back, classy and not obnoxious. The parading carousel of alternating uniforms is annoying. It's like being on a ski slope in 1987, day glo city. Or like being trapped in REM's "Shiny Happy People" video. GO DUCKS! Autzen Stadium is a shrine for loudness. U of O in the BCS Championship? Maybe.

 I also have opening night tickets to Portland's only game, Blazers VS Hornets next Wed. so kind of excited about that. Yeah, its a little better than Bobcats opening night though...eh? But I'm a Sonics fan 1st, Blazers 2nd. Check out my Sonic blog, it's called Sha Lock Lock Sonic Boom, there is a link to it right here on the Bolt blog page. It gets better as the season goes on. I'm committed to the bolts Blog till we win the Bowl! Like MC Hammer I will pray...yes, I'll pray...we gots to pray just to make it today! And pray the Sonics stay in Seattle.

 I'm gonna be honest. I was bored today besides the big plays. I was sober and the 2nd hand smoke got to me. And when your not drunk, drunk people are so freakin' annoying! God that Texans offense was like nails on the chalkboard. Rob Dayne is like having Jackie Gleason as RB. But Jackie Gleason was faster. Freakin' sloths could catch that guy from behind!  HOU QB Matt Schaub was knocked out of the game for foolishly taking two steps toward the play after he was intercepted and being cracked hard by Stephen Cooper I believe. Who was wrongly penalized I feel. Then we were treated to the back up QB who strikes fear into the hearts of men, SAGE! Sage Rosenthals came in to lend a hand in the INT fest. So does Sage have a sister named Raindrop? Are ye going to Scarborough Fair? We thumped a bad team. Or did we just make them look that bad? A little of both I feel. On to Minneapolis. And the Vikes. More of the same awaits you Norse peeps.

It Started With TX in 2004

 OK, no more politics...football. We gonna rage over the Texans like a fire up a hillside. Nice analogy. I apologize. Serious recovery could begin with an inspiring Bolt victory. It is only Houston, right? I read somewhere's that Norv said this was THE week of great practices. Practice? Terrell would say. I always hate to hear practice went well. Considering though, I'll take it. The Chargers talent will make a good coach out of Norv yet before seasons end!

I'll take this Ohio Players...

over this...if only for today.

Never Would I Call

 I'm political and liberal. I believe in CHANGE. My politics will subside for football. But I know why decisions are made. The Chargers will play the Texans this Sunday in Qual...oh wait...the freakin' Murph! When your stadium gave up being called what it was way back when. Cuz $$ makes it be called Moneydividedbypolitics/Park. All u kids is too stupid too see. The world is ready to die, what sustains you. In Berkley, college students don't protest. They is out for the career without humility. Where is the New Orleans love? You read about Drew Brees house in SD and his in New Orleans? At the same time. But he has $$ and insurance. Only 7 inches of rain in Saint town and the levees barely held. Watch your TV's and pretend it ain't your country. We got football and Applebee's, your neighborhood grill. Not my grill. I'm disgusted by another GWB appearance, but Ahnold did something and in the media way...when Ahnold stood next to Bush, it was the movie TWINS! Cool.

 OK...football. Uhhhh....Chargers...Texans...Fire. We are going to WIN...easy. Need I not say what the motivational factor is?

 I must add this late equation to the mix. Fat Kitty Falafel closes 2morrow so I can watch the U of OOOOOOOOOOOOO...yep, that was 13 O's. Beat USC. Autzen will be bumpin'. Dixon...thanks for playin' pro baseball.

 You all think it can't happen to you. Welcome to the the new world of non global warming, natural disasters that just got a little out of hand, no problem here just move on and get your shoppin' on! Oh, yeah, I'm an idiot cuz I hate AOL and such. We are all on a dead template somewhere. Step in your car, get pulled over...your an inch away from being tased if you disagree. Try it. I do it for a living. Just to see, no? And where are those C 130s and the nat'l guard?...oh...in IRAQ. To protect that sand from fire.

 Yep, this WAS a Charger blog. And still is. I guarantee I'm on a "WATCH LIST" What a waste of time and $$. Cuz I get emails from Amman Jordan, from someone I love! Then I hear all the people that live here say, stupid people live in these places and never rebuild. 9.0 earthquake potential rests in Portland. I know better than you all, just some. This is or was a somewhat free land. WE ALL IN THE SAME GANG...air breathe

 I highly recommend a song by James McMurtry on You Tube and the world "We Can't Make It Here Anymore". He ain't your Tug McGraw's relief pitcher's son, Ford sellin, boot up the ass Iraq boy. You wanna hear real life, give James McMurtry 5 mins of your time before your Egg McSluffin.

 Don't believe Al Gore...George Bush has his finger in the environmental pie.

 I love some politickin with my football. Cuz if we ain't free and our neighborhoods don't burn, then what do we got? What we always have had, more freedom for some

 I'm gone in the middle o the night, and the day I had was most likely, better than yours, I could teach you, but I'd have to charge...my milkshake brings the beetches to the yard. Peace detractors. GO U OF O!

 

Fire to Phoenix

 My best goes out to ALL people in SoCal at risk. At risk of losing homes and livelihoods, that is more than NFL games. But the games will go on. Before I get into the coming week I stress that SoCal is in flames and it is my old home and I have many friends there currently. I will keep checking their status. So I'm praying for rain. It has affected the Chargers also. Besides residences in peril and Charger family evacuations, another bad haunt from the past has returned.

 We had fire in our past and got burned by it. And by thruway of Phoenix. A Sunday night game not played in San Diego, but was scheduled to be. Fires near the Murph made us play the game in Phoenix, I forget who it was. But I think we got crushed...more coming.............P.S...It was Green Bay 2003, the year before we became formidable. And we wore all dark blue.

 As I type the winds have died, but the fires rage, it is still hot. San Diego St game is canceled. Not the Chargers. My true gut feeling is, neutral, they ain't playin' in Murphy. The Rockies are being crushed.

 In response to isellproperty's comment, Jane's Addiction spells it out for me...Idiot's RULE! Ask Iggy Pop. My daddy sells & owns property, an I bet it's a ton more than you and your daddy! Thanks for reading though. It's good to be called a name again. Give me time on a pre game blog, let the smoke clear per se...

AOL Reduced by 20%

 I read that AOL is cutting its workforce, that's what us falafel indies call downsizing. I wonder Jamie Mottram if u survived the cut? Cool...peeps read my blog, the Red Sox will lose and Monponsett will get off that horse. Fuck Fanhouse, I'll tell you where the fans are. Writing for free on the net...whether they be Nugent far enders, or cross toed tennis shoe intensity...AOL fights for nothing. I actually paid their fee in fear I wouldn't be able to write after some people actually read my blog. Then AOL said it was they're promotion got me there. Ya'll is a mullet fuck train to nowhere...scuse me whilst I adjust this dangler earring.

 I just watched the movie "The Bridge"...jump AOL...just jump. But at least the back stories of the jumpers had integrity.  Bite me AOL, and  Fan House. I do it 4 real. Scratch ticket fitty cent will back out but ya won't pussies.  Sweet...a bye week. 20%, taint no big thang, cept I'm on ur freakin template. Least it's free to write, ya'll is gonna slowly be lowered into this pit. Ah, who cares? Just 20% less of for free AOL and those sweet banners. I never forget a fuck, specially a bad one. I feel bad for you 2000 people, but you shoulda talked to me 1st. I coulda told you. Bolts 4ever and fuck Mitt Romney. Call me what you will, I know where the problems lie. You will pay AOL, oh wait...u have. Fuck you Jamie, thanks for checkin' in. George C...thanks.Remember this last ditch effort, the running man, where is that Asian goalie, or for that fact, the gov of CA? Again, as I read AOL can't sell...you fucked me once, and forgot. My biz thrives, yours sucks. You suck. Buh Bye.

Powder Puff

 Superman in powder blue, looked like the Air Jordan from the free throw line, BOOM! Here come the boys from the south, HA HA...how u like me now? LT, like Clapton, is God. Laying down the 10 commandments of rushing and a disciple of receiving also. Just an all around kinda cool God. With #21 on his robe and no beard. Powder Blue robe in the height of fashion. Bolts flyin' and parting NFL defenses like freakin' Moses parted the Red Sea. Honorary adapted son of the Flash. The Flash shoulda worn powder blue tights, that woulda been fly. Welcome back to the big mix LT, and thank you for being an intrigal part of the huge W over the dark side. The team we thought we'd have in '07 is starting to jell as we head into the buh bye week. 

 The Bolts broke out quick. One foolish play and most inappropriately timed at that, almost turned an entire 1st half of domination into a stalemate on the scoreboard only. But the DB's saved the day and we didn't head down the old Charger road of defeat and asking why? We overcame a momentum crushing, game changing play. Never blinked. The dee came out and did it when it counted. Philip Rivers will not throw that INT again, or hopefully very rarely. It's a learning experience, in the worst way. My life froze for a second, I saw it on TV setting up before the throw was made and even my armchair quarterback skills saw that and I was looking downfield. When Philip threw it, before it left his fingers, I knew, I swear! It's years of football watching, Philip came back strong. And the whole arsenal was at his disposal, and functioning well.

 Gates IS the tight end model. Gazelle man but in Charles Atlas body. And the gazelle is crossed with a ram. Get the picture? Oh, that fumble out the back the end zone on a sure TD sucked. Nice moves. But another life crushing Charger play. Snatching defeat from the jaws of victory. The difference is now...we come back after these plays. A good sign. The Chargers are cardiac in the way they can just give away momentum from ill timed plays. Sorry. This comes from years of seeing it and I'm a realist. But I like the team that came out in the 2nd half.

 The Raiders came to play. We had a few and one real verbal Raider fans at Claudia's. And 30 Bolt die hards. Never did it get ugly. But boy that Raider boy start poppin' after that huge INT.  Jammer sat his ass down. Kept the damage to a minimum. Boy I'll admit though, there were 3 Raider chicks ala chica beautiful. I would have sex with the enemy but only to learn they're secrets. No...I woulda been a ready and willing participant. And never would give up the playbook. But all you Raider dudes suck. Not really. Only kinda. Once you take off the grease paint, lycra, fishnets, road warrior regalia there are some decent people under there. Terribly flawed but decent. After we would score I would hear, "Who's got the rings Charger fans?". He is right in a way, but him being about 22 killed the buzz for me.

Celebrate good times...C'MON. AG n LT celebrate LT's 27 yd TD scamper in the 1st quarter. I am in reality. We have more to prove. To everybody. I'm a naysayer. I get Banwagonesque. Dump on when it's bad, heaps o sugar when it's good. Norv is a saint now? Not quite. But the royal Charger court of jester's like me will with hold judgment for now.

Raider Tribute

Expose dem Raidahs!

  I'm all recovered and returned from the Bay Area. I crossed the Bay Bridge and saw nemesis town. Oakland. Jr Varsity...no wait frosh/soph to SF. I hexed Oaktown then and there. It kinda looked like Scranton. Instead of seagulls there were vultures. That place could suck the chrome off a trailer hitch! I waved goodbye to the blackhead by the Bay and I knew then and there...we are gonna keel haul dem Raiders!

  A brittle and unreliable Dante Culpepper at the helm with Jamarcus in the wings? Don't roll out alot Mr Pepper. I have faith we'll dominate. Like Slim Shady said, Will the real Slim Shady please stand up. Will the real Chargers please stand up? Alot of sports radio guys I heard this week were saying Denver is just that bad. Or are we coming out of our shell? A W over the Raiders (I think we are on 8 straight now) is always sweet but this means alot as we can get to the top, tied with everybody in the West with a W. Or a few after this Sunday's games. Plus it's a division win, it all figures in the mix later.

  OK, I talk tough and put down Oakland cuz of the rivalry but I'm gonna give the Raiders some deserved props. They seem to be much improved. Lane Kiffin has them on the bandwagon and that's so much more than last years squad. Also the law of averages catches up eventually, but 9 straight looms. Maybe some intangibles in play. Thats all I'm gonna say good about Pirates of the East bay.


Yeah, it's cliche but so appropriate. Say hello to my little friend! Raider Cock A Roach!
 

When a Raider fan has pounded that last road warrior spike in his kiddie shoulder pads, used gallons of silver spray paint, Raiderized to oblivion. They digress, and return to they're true form. Divine or Barney. 40 something Raider fan thinks Davey & Goliath was spiritual and deep. Where was the freakin' Kwanza episode DAAAAVEEEEYYYY?

Here he comes, here comes Philip Rivers, he's a demon on wheels! He's a demon and he's gonna be chasin' after someone!

This is kinda like the Super Cuts of Oaktown. Last I heard they was goin' under. Raider crowd hair like a freakin' NHL crowd, oh and team.

I pretend, therefore Iam who you am i thought. I mean, I'm as here as you drunk Iam. Or is this Brian Bosworth in his new movie? Just another Raider fan. Good luck Pirates of Penzance!

Bay Area Charger

 I disappeared, took a train to everywhere. No, not that train. Just the Amtrak. To San Francisco, or Emeryville. Oh...and did it all turn out good...fuck yeah! From the start, before football. Rocked in Friday nite with a band I loved when I was 15, I'm 46 now. The cool difference between 1976 and 2007 is...I'm older and know where to drink in public and how to do it. Oh wait, and NOT inhale. Saw a band called STARZ, lookem up. Cleveland knows. And your Charger writer heah had the TIME! I'll spare ya the details of my trip and tell ya where I ended up...to watch the Chargers at one of the coolest neigh hood bars in SF, and it just happened to be about 22 blocks from where I was born. And I got 1/2 my drinks for free, OK for real a 1/3. I'm so glad I talk and pimp my biz. Oh, you 3 reading this now, go to fatkitty.biz...right now.

 It was on in the Bay, Fleet Week. The military was sellin' and I shook hands and said thank you. To the young men and women that make it right, for real. I'll save ya the hugs I received after stating my support and disdain for GWB. All the military people I went out of my way to meet and greet were so happy to hear what I had to say when we got to talkin'. Power of the Blue Angels can make everyone feel powerful.

 Oh, and the Ravens fans. Thanks for the many free drinks and fun. And the hell u say any bad about the Baltimore peeps I met. Saw like 3 Niner jerseys. I could walk up to a Raven fan...you would have to know my charisma of course. Tell him I think she/he sucked for beating us last yr and they just were so cool. I think I paid for no drinks in this one bar. BALTIMORE I say to you. It may have been the 75 degree weather and your chance to come and visit, ya'll was beautiful and friendly. Niner fans and the city I was born in...ya'll sucked. Living in the past and fair weathered. It was refreshing to see some east coast passion. Even though the actual game musta been like the middle of baseball season, Tampa @ Texas. Ravens fans who flocked to the Bay...ya'll got the W.

 So the Bolt game was destiny. Yeah, I break up during the season. Cuz I know. The Norv thing. It's Raider week. I know what Denver is. We still are so in it. I crumble and sound like a fan sometimes...cuz I don't get paid like Fanhouse. IAM A 4 REAL FAN. I drink, travel and try to be unprofessionalprofessional...catch my drift paid boys?


 Pimpin' w/N'Stinct look him up on myspace and listen to "Tennis Shoes" He will be the next Oak town killer. No, I hate the Raiders...NOT Oakland...wait...I do. I wore a Seals jersey on purpose. A dead team that had no point now, but it woke up a buncha dead souls and I knew it would.

 OK...to the game. I took the 7 N Judah train, to the hood I grew up in. When I was Niner boy, real boy, like birth thru 7 yrs old. Still hadn't found a bar w/a guaranteed Charger showing. Let's just say I asked a dude on the train as I headed to my old hood, and he was dressed to a t and I mentioned my hood, birth, connection and what I needed. This gentleman told me he was off at 23rd and would walk me right by a bar that might put it on. We walked after getting off the train, he points across the street to a bar called Finnegan's Wake, and before we part ways he says, "Tell Johnny the bartender that John from the Absinthe sent ya." Sounds like a 30's movie huh?

 I walked into Patriots and Sox fans and it was soooo much fun. All Boston boys and girls in the bar, transplants from the hell they once called home. Not one rarely turned to watch the Pats game, it was the Sox. The Niners game was on a 13" TV in nowhereville and (1) person was watching. A few Charger fans drifted in. I told the btender about me and that I met some dude named John from the Absinthe and boy oh boy, we got Bolts on the biggest screen and my balance was in my favor. I know I was cut the deal. I love being loud, reputable...and on the right side of the food business! Turns out this Absinthe place was something else. My fate is a broke ass brilliant fool so far. Huh. Thanks John from Absinthe, I haven't even looked you up yet. but a million others told me about it. I was ridin' a 1-3 team and fearful. Still am.

 I'm through with pussyfuttin'! Fuckin' accept the fact the Bolts are snakebit to now. We have the lizard. let's suck out the poison to save the life. Who is gonna do it for this team?

 Oh, no descriptions or hefore to with whatever about last week's game. It was a joke. One dude in the bar who was out of it kept repeating that it was in SD.  Uh, ok. The Charger fans were pretty weak cept for Eddie. Musta been 85 or so and bought me without having to, a $10 Bloody Mary.Eddie almond boy...Salud, TANX alot. I got so disinterested in my game you'd grab me and tell me to pay attention. 41-3. Nice. Johnny Brooklyn salud, whatchu doin' in SF? Yeah, that's how cool it was. Reservoir Dog's Cool, when it mattered. It matters. Chargers. Matter. Raiders? Sorry I can't get this picture straight, but babies behind .50 cals at an air show? It is kinda cute, huh? Think about it. And $8 Coors Lights in a fenced in area while in the front row were the "corporate" tents. I swear to you it said corporate sponsors...u name em, and it ain't Popeye's Chicken, with all branches of the military logos side by side. This ain't issuin' peanut butter and Lucky strikes no more. Just sellin' the next 10 yrs of death, minimum. Man, I'm glad the Chargers made me not think why for a weekend. Oh, the Stanford thing was pretty cool, see ya SC suckahs, welcome to the real world. Get ready Oaktown foolz, it's gonnabe nine in a row and a walkover.